How to find a good mentor

We become like the people we admire and the models we follow. For that reason, we should take great care when determining which people we ask to mentor us. They must not only display professional excellence and possess skill sets from which we can learn, they must also demonstrate character worthy of emulating

Tips to guide you in finding good mentors

1.  Find a next-step mentor. Think about where you are currently in your career and the direction you would like to go. Look for someone you admire who is two or three steps ahead of you on that same track. This person doesn’t necessarily need to be in your organization. Look for the qualities needed in a goal mentor; a worthy example, availability, proven experience, wisdom, willingness to be supportive, and coaching skills. If those are present in this individual, ask him or her to mentor you. Before any meeting with a mentor, come prepared with three to five thoughtful questions, the answers to which will help you significantly. After you’ve met, work to apply what you’ve learned to your own situation. Don’t ask for another meeting until you have done that. At your next meeting, begin the sesson by telling your mentor how you applied what you learned (or how you tried to apply it and failed, so you can learn what you did wrong). Then ask your new questions. Follow this pattern, and you mentor will be rewarded for his or her effort and will probably be glad to continue helping you.
2. We all need people who can help us sharpen specific strengths or navigate through certain problem areas. Whom do you talk to when you have questions related to career, marriage, parenting, spiritual growth, disciplines, hobbies, and so on? No one person can answer all of these questions. You need to find several individual “consultants” to help you.  Spend some time making two lists. First, list the specific strengths or skills you want to improve to reach your potential. Second, list the specific problem areas where you feel the need for ongoing guidance. Begin looking for people with expertise in these particular area and ask them if they would be willing to answer questions when you have them.
3. Do you have long-term models whom you observe, follow, and learn from, people who can give you advice regarding the big picture of your life and career? Or are you trying to improve while having no one but yourself to follow? If you haven’t been asking others to help you on this journey, it’s time to start. Most of us begin by looking for worthy models to follow by reading about them in books. Start there. But don’t leave it at that. Look for people who will give you access to their lives.
   As you look for models and mentors, I want to give you a word of caution. Oftentimes, people look good from far away, but when you get to know them, you discover qualities you don’t admire. If that happens to you, please don’t allow it to discourage you. There are plenty of people out there who have integrity and who are worthy to be respected and followed. Keep looking for them and you will find them